Holiday?

I'm bored. I'm supposed to take a break now that I'm kinda done with my writing. But a weekend alone (yeah, most of my friends have gone on holiday, and those still around are not the ones I really want to hang out with) is making me crawling up the walls with boredom. Why is it that when one who was so busy desired so much to have all the free time, and yet when the time comes there desire to work comes back? Irony? Or maybe because I haven't settled my future plan yet. I'm still undecided on what to do with my life. yes, I'm an not that young a person who should still be struggling with this question... or so it seems.

I used to think this is what I would like to do, but lately I feel that I've gone a little bit off course. Since young I've always like to go into conservation. Sometime in my undergrad I've decided that evolution was a better choice, since I did well in those subjects than ecology. I do tend to do better in medical-related subjects too, thus ended up with medical entomology. It is still an interesting subject, but I wonder if it is really worth a day job for?

Well, not just in medical entomology, but scientific research positions in general. After years of studies, honing your skills for such specialities, what kind of job do you end up with? Working as a postdoc, if you intend to stay on with research. The pay is terrible (it really is terrible), the benefits near none, working hours are long... At least if you were to study medicine, with the same amount of years put in, you would have been a senior doctor by now or a surgeon.

And the BBC reports that kids nowadays are losing interest in science. Less scientist are being churned out and will affect our ability to be at the cutting edge of scientific discovery. Well, how about pay us scientist to work huh? the average train driver gets paid more than researchers.

I say, maybe, just maybe, the kids are smart.

Anyway, digression over.
Back to the subject. Bored. So I came into lab, to the surprise of some people. Look at my babies in the insectary to make sure they have food and water. Talked to the boss, demanding we write a paper ASAP. He agreed. Now I have something to do, write a scientific paper. Hours later, pondering on my unwritten paper, I decided that I should take a holiday.

I've finally submitted

There it sat my two copies of my thesis... nearly 300 pages long... on the old wooden bench of the examination school... and off it went tucked in two ginormous envelopes, ready to be sent to my examiners. It may be a relief, but years of my life was basically summarised in The Thesis. I'm exhausted, and feeling strangely empty.

The next leg awaits... the oral exam and meantime, the hunt for a real job. *sob*.